How to tell my mom im gay

Your parents may only see how this could negatively affect them or you, but hopefully, in time, they will come to see how your coming out positive affects you.

This revelation will have a great impact on your life and it's important to consider the possible negative consequences of coming out. But they will need good information and guidance, and you can help them find it.

Providing resources can take many forms: a conversation, a list, a text (or several), an email, a book, a conversation with an accepting family member you trust who might talk with them.

It can offer you the chance to express your identity and emotions thoroughly and gives your parents time to process the information before reacting. If they are not accepting at first, they may change and come around.

If there are people that you would rather not know about your decision, it is important to tell your parents to be discreet; they may unknowingly tell someone that you would rather they not.

If you decide to get involved with the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered community, it may be unrealistic to expect friends and family to take part right away.

Embracing every part of us— including our sexuality — is the path towards an authentic, beautifully self-affirming life. Whether you’re 15 or 40, your journey to self-acceptance and sharing your truth with your parents is unique to your circumstance and timeline. 

However, coming out before you’re a legal adult can make things difficult if your parents don’t receive the news well and react negatively – something becoming more relevant as the average coming out age is progressively becoming younger.Research from the Trevor Project supports this, indicating that the average age at which people come out differs between adolescents and young adults.

Will you be able to support yourself if needed? Introductions can be made later, or if they already have met your partner, you can tell them his or her significance at a later date.

When Coming Out to Parents, Have a Plan

It's wise to plan out what you are going to say. How you choose to communicate your truth can vary based on your comfort level, your relationship with your parents, and their anticipated reaction.

And each vital aspect of this stage requires careful thought and exploration.

Ensuring Your Personal Safety

When it comes to expressing your true identity, your security should always be paramount.

If the conversation becomes too intense or emotional, it is OK to end it.

• This is the first conversation; there will be many. It's about finding a calm moment, sitting down with your parents, and sharing your truth. The beauty of the LGBTQ+ experience is its inconsistency, with each individual's journey marked by its unique contours, colors and tune.

  While some may accept these changes, others will act differently towards you. As part of your preparation, gather educational resources that can help them to understand your experiences better. As their love for us prompts a brave march towards acceptance, their perspective changes and evolves, adjusting with each step to understand and support us better.

  If they seem open, you may be able to share resources quickly, or you may want to wait till later when things cool down, or even share a “drip campaign” of resources over time.

  There are several excellent resources for you and for parents, but their approaches vary greatly. You might want to tell a close friend before you tell your parents. Children fear rejection, so being nervous about this is very common -- and almost expected.

  Think about potential questions they might have and how you would answer them. You must be patient and true to yourself above all, and things can gradually change for the better.

  Be Prepared to Answer Questions

  Before you come out to your parents, inform yourself on questions you think they might ask.

  You need to feel ready and comfortable to discuss your orientation, on your terms and at your own pace.

  Understanding Parents' Reaction To LGBTQ+ Topics

  Having a sense of how your parents would react can help you plan your approach. While some showed unconditional support, others struggled with their child’s sexual orientation, fearing alienation from their extended family, their church, or their community.

  Especially helpful for parents who just learned your identity and/or who are struggling.

• Parent Support Guide – We provide a 5-part Parent Guide delivered through email once a week. It may take a long time for them to become accepting and supportive as they adjust and change their view of the family and your future.

Get ready for a wide range of reactions.

• Your parents could be relieved, understanding, loving, affectionate and supportive when you come out.